Recently, I had the opportunity to sit and talk with Cindy Fabico, MA, NCC, LMHC about her approach to individual and couples counseling at her practice, Life Skills Resource Group in Orlando. I must admit that I was the only one sitting, as Cindy was so enthusiastic about her role as a therapist that she remained standing almost the entire time. I hardly had to ask her anything, as she was so knowledgeable about her field that she required no talking points from me. The following is a brief summary of what was said during that conversation…
According to Cindy, we’re always sending ourselves messages, both good and bad. But what do they mean and how do we know which ones to listen to? Well, in therapy, Cindy begins by helping her clients to develop an awareness of those messages and how to track them (consciousness). She teaches her clients to acknowledge that the negative is real, but that they’re not going to fixate and focus on it. They can’t dwell on it. They must grieve what was and move on to what is. They learn to not dwell on the future, either. For if they focus on thoughts like “When ________ happens, I’ll be happy,” they won’t be doing anything about it in the meantime. They learn to stop being miserable and self-medicating with food, alcohol, sex, etc.
Cindy points out that if you want to be in shape, you go to the gym and eat right. If you want to be happy and feel good about your life, then you actively practice every day. How? You focus on what’s good instead of what’s bad. You take a good look at the people you spend time with (and make adjustments). If they’re not supporting your health and growth, what’s the use of being around them? You read books and journal. You exercise and get enough sleep. Cindy finds that by doing these things, people can change how their brains work. Even those who may be more prone to depression can rewire their brains for happiness.
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